Meet Stanley

Hey y'all!

    So as you can tell from the title, I have adopted a new buddy! Meet Stanley the Fish:

    Stanley is a male betta fish. Trent and I got him via the adoption method from one of our friends on the island. He is like, a opalescent pink and deep blue-violet in color and was pretty sick when we got him. (i.e. lethargic, not eating, and just kind of sitting in the bottom of the 1 liter tank he was in. We finally got him eating again and did some research on beta care and maintenance. This website: (CLICK HERE) is so full of information and helpful tips... So here is what we went and got from a local fish store here on Oahu. 

    We went and purchased this 5 gallon plastic rectangular tank. That way he has plenty of room to swim and we could fill it with stuff.

    Now, before you go putting anything in the tank, it needs to be washed. In other words, you have no idea where it's been... so wash that sumbitch. So, that meant that we had to wash every rock and artificial plant that we purchased.

This is Trent washing the rocks... cause I knew I would spill it down the drain and break the disposal.

The plants being washed

That white material is aquarium salt to wash everything with. A little went a LONG way. Like, a half a pinch for the whole tank

    Now, the pottery that we got for the tank, for him to explore and have fun with, needs to sit and soak for the next 24 hours to make sure it's completely clean... So it isn't in the tank yet... But isn't it cute?!

    The rocks are in! Surprisingly, one bag of the rocks was almost too much. But it covered and anchored everything pretty well. 

    Now the plants and water are being added. We did a gallon at a time.... It made life so much easier.

    That leaf you see is something called Almond Leaf and it's supposed to be very good for betta fish. We also got this stuff called Betta Revive that is supposed to help cure and prevent any nasty diseases that bettas can get. Warning: It's very blue.

    The final product! We had to slowly acclimate him to the water. Which felt like it took forever. Ugh. But after waiting 45 minutes we finally put him in. :)

Happy Fishy

Zoom!

    And that is Stanley the fish. :) He is very happy in his new tank with all the new things to explore and enjoy. Once the pottery things are safe, we will put those in and he will have even more to explore! 

    That is all for now, I might make another post tonight before going to bed. But we will see! :)

-Haley

Liar Liar Pants On Fire

Hey y'all,

    So, I have learned a very valuable lesson. From this lesson, I have learned and grown as a person, but unfortunately, it has cause the loss of the trust required for a full friendship. There are a few things on this planet that I consider to be unforgivable.

Lying

Abusing

Cheating

    All of these happened within a few days after that post I made about Mary. Like, literally... maybe a week. I found out about all the lies, about how my kindness and generosity was used, and about all the cheating that was taking place with my friend Stacy*. Stacy and her boyfriend broke up. She was devastated and said she was willing to do anything to fix it and get back together. What she actually meant was that she was willing to do anything but be honest and stop lying.

    Needless to say, we had a come to Jesus moment when I figured everything out. It was quite intense, emotionally draining, and physically exhausting. Physically exhausting because instead of showing up like it was important, I was angry all day long. Which isn't a normal thing for me. Although, I did find out how much of my mother I had in me... And I am both proud and terrified at the results... All that power and I am just now tapping into it. haha.

    Anyone that thinks that cheating is okay, is so not welcome in my home. I believe in loyalty, monogamy, and just being honest with the person you choose to spend your life with. The only saving grace in that situation is that it was only in the dating phase. There wasn't a marriage or kids involved. 

    I love Stacy. I really do... but she definitely has some growing up to do and really needs to figure out her priorities in life.

    Well, that's all that I am posting for tonight. Hopefully there will be more (Positive) things to come in the future!

-Haley

*Names changed for security

Here's a Smidge

Hey y'all!

    I know I haven't posted lately... But I have been super busy! With Christmas just passing, and New Years just around the corner, I feel like the energizer bunny! I have been baking cookies, making good meals, making special drinks, and flitting from activity to activity like a busy honey bee.

    I have done some growing in the last week or so. I put my foot down on where I refuse to budge, and in doing so, I hope that I made my point clear and opened some eyes to what they were doing. (May post about it later) I also witnessed a Christmas Miracle. A family member of mine survived a heart attack and is defying all odds. 

    Not to mention... I made fudge. In a microwave. And it was as smooth as butter. :3 I will be posting the recipe with photos to the Recipe page. So keep an eye out for it! :)

    I hope y'all had a wonderful Christmas! :) It definitely didn't feel like Christmas, but I will take it. I mean, how many people can celebrate Christmas in Hawaii? Haha.

    Well, that is it for now, talk to y'all later!

-Haley

Where Are You Christmas?

Hey y'all!

    On this blog post, I want to talk about something that I have been struggling with. Normally, this time of year, I am a bubbly little Christmas sprite. Like, full on Christmas music, baking, singing, watching movies, decorating, and giving person.

    Well, this year, I find myself in a rut. I am not entirely sure what's going on, but I think that it's a combination of things that are going on in my life that have just stacked in front of that Christmas Door... Which totally sucks. I feel like the holiday's are changing... and I am not kept in the loop that has Christmas Spirit. I just feel like I am going around in circles, like I am just doing the motions. I am used to playing Christmas Movies all day, every day, and going out shopping and being around my family. 

   I think that's a big part of my lackadaisical Christmas Spirit... I am in Hawaii, which doesn't feel like Christmas, about 3,000+ miles away from my family. Yes, I have Trent here, but I am used to tons of people being around and all the craziness and joy with my family. I guess I'm just blah.

   I am hoping that I can get myself out of this funk and get into that Christmas Spirit. So tomorrow, I am going to make a whole bunch of cookies and play nothing but Christmas Movies and kinda throw myself into it and hope for the best.

    Anyway, I have got to go clean up some more. Talk to y'all later!

-Haley 

Momma Didn't Raise No Fool

Hey y'all.

    So today's post will be a blog post and a ranting session. I apologize in advance if I kinda bounce all over the place. 

    I had a friend, Mary*, that seemed to be pretty cool. We hung out a couple of times out here in Hawaii... and she and I seemed to get along rather well. Her boyfriend was a military member, which was yet another thing that we had in common. One weekend, she stayed the night and we all were drinking. In the midst of our jovial intake of spirits, she received a phone call and left the room. We didn't think anything of it, until she didn't come back. We went looking for her and found her curled up and crying. 

    I had no idea what she was saying, all I knew was that she was upset and that she was my friend and I needed to make sure she was okay. We waited for her to calm down and she told us that a mutual friend of ours had just found out that a family member was terminally ill... and that he was wanting to come see her seeing as she was his best friend. So he came over and we went inside to give them some space... He was upset and only wanted his best friend. (Mind you, this was the dude that she was doing the bed sheet tango with) She promised that they weren't doing it anymore, that she wanted to focus on her relationship with her boyfriend. 

    Later that night, we were sitting out on the front porch and she told us that she was so upset about the news because she could relate. And by relate, she meant that she had cancer... and only had a year and a half to live. This was a huge bombshell. She looked so healthy. The next morning, her and I were sitting at the table, and she told me that her meds that she took could make her live up to 2 years. I told her I would keep her in my prayers. She went as far as to show us each of the pills that she had to take.

    We continued on with our day and she said that she had to go home cause her boyfriend was upset. I told her to let me know when she got home and to drive safe and with that, she left.

    Two hours later, I received a text message from Mary stating that she was at the hospital and that she would fill me in later. I was a nervous wreck. I didn't know which hospital, and I didn't know what had happened. Finally, 6 hours later, she told us that she was in the mental ward, and that she had thoughts of causing permanent harm to herself and it scared her so she went to the hospital.

    The following morning, we went and visited her in the mental ward... She was on some pretty good drugs, so she wasn't completely there. Her best friend was there as well, and they were all over each other. -Signal the first Red Flag-

    After the visit, I didn't know how to feel, so I settled with happy that she was okay. About two days after that, she had signed herself out of the hospital, even though she told us she didn't feel any better. But her mom was there, so we weren't too concerned. Later that day, she messaged us saying that while she was in the mental ward, they did a biopsy of her tumors and it came back as a lump of cells. That it wasn't cancer. -Signal second Red Flag- But, misdiagnoses happens more often than we would like, so I gave her the benefit of the doubt. I asked her how her parents were handling the health insurance bills... because that can be pretty stressful on someone... and she told me, "I signed paperwork when I was 18 that barred them from seeing what I get done health wise." -Signal next Red Flag-

    Two days later, she messaged us and said that they had drained the cyst in her neck. When I asked her what she was talking about, (a cyst is very different from a tumor), she said that they did more tests and it turned out to be a cyst. -Signal final Red flag-

    So, my list of lies that Mary has told me are the following:

1. She had cancer

2. It was a benign tumor... not cancer

3. Turns out the benign tumor was actually a cyst... the doctors had it wrong and she had been paying thousands of dollars on harsh medicine for her body... but she was cool with it.

4. She wasn't boinking her guy best friend while still with her boyfriend.

5. She barred her parents from seeing what their health insurance was being used for.

    Hefty list. 

    So, I confronted her. I asked her about everything. I have had members of my family pass from cancer. I know how much the world's most expensive health insurance covers... And it isn't a lot. Anything that is associated with cancer, it's expensive. She then tried to tell me that she was discharged by her doctor... that she didn't sign herself out. When I sent her the screenshot of our discussions... all of a sudden, "everything is a blur." 

    I couldn't take it anymore. I called her on her lies. I called her out on everything. I caught her in her lies, and like her imaginary tumor, I cut her out of my life. I don't need someone who is going to lie about serious things like that.

    When I asked her what she was going to do about her boyfriend, and if she was going to tell him the truth, she said, "I don't want to ruin his Christmas. Once my mom and I get a place, I will move in with her and then I will tell him." She's basically using him for a place to stay... when he thinks he is being the most supportive person ever.

    Evil girl. So glad that I discovered who she really was before I got in too deep.

*Name has been changed

    Whew. I feel worlds better getting all that off my chest.

    Anyway, I have been doing everything I can to get into the Christmas Spirit, and it got me thinking. What is the Christmas Spirit? Here's my answer:

    It's not about gifts, it's not the lights on the house, or the ornaments on the tree. It's sitting in your home with the people that you love and knowing that you are happy, healthy, and in good company. It's seeing your fellow mankind and smiling and waving instead of avoiding eye contact like it were the plague. It's going out and feeling full when you are with a group of friend and y'all are laughing and having a good time.

    I see all these videos of kids losing it when they get socks or clothes... And it breaks my heart. So I will do everything in my power to make sure that when I have children, that I pass that same message along. Christmas Spirit = Love.

    Trent is still off doing Navy stuff, so I am going to finish off the Christmas Cards and get caught up on laundry and housework. 

    In the mean time, what are some traditions you have in your family? Have you ever been in a situation where you knew someone was lying and they just continues to lie like that? It's so stressful!

-Haley

So This is Love

Hey y'all! My name is Haley and I am going to tell you the story of how I fell in love.

-Flashback to September 2008-

    I was 16 years old, single, and a sophomore in High School. Now, I was a shy, simple girl who loved one thing, and one thing only. Music. I played for 2 of my High School's orchestras. Their Symphony Orchestra, and their Strolling Strings group Rhapsody. I spent the majority of my time in the orchestra room practicing and, essentially, isolating myself from my peers. Our Orchestra conductor one day, told us to play in front of people. That it would build up our confidence in playing. So I did. I went out to the courtyard with my violin and played whatever music my heart so desired. 

    Much to my surprise, it was well received. My peers would come by and listen and hang out while I played, and would sometimes make requests. It became so much fun. There was one boy in particular that never made a request, but would walk over and listen for a few minutes every day.

    No. This is not where we started talking and fell in love. This is where we first saw each other. I was much too shy to talk to someone I didn't know. That's what my music did for me. But he would listen almost every day and leave when the bell rang. We didn't speak a single word to each other. 

-Fast Forward to June 2010-

    I was now 18, graduated from high school, and preparing for my first semester of college. One night, after a long day of 115 degree weather in Arizona, I was scrolling through Facebook, seeing all these people out partying and having a blast. I wanted to be out doing something, but didn't have those kinds of friends. So I made myself content with sitting at my desk, looking at funny pictures and reading sentiments of graduation... When something remarkable happened. An errant friend request. 

    His name was Trent and he looked familiar... But if there is one thing any of you should know about me. I am absolutely terrible at remembering which name belongs to which face. So I came up with an idea to help with that. I opened his profile and sent him the following message:

                    "I apologize, but I do not recognize who you are. That could very well be my fault, as I am bad with the whole names to faces thing. Please tell me how I know you within two days or your request will be denied."

    Smooth... huh? (Goodness I was such a weird teenager....) I figured that I wouldn't hear anything that night and went back to my previous activities of trolling through Facebook. Maybe a half hour later, I got a message back from this Trent character and all it said was the following:

                    "Are you the girl that played the violin in the courtyard?"

    *Now this, ladies and gentlepeeps, is the smoothest intro on the face of the planet. Boys, take note. If you remember something that the girl you are interested in did a while ago.... You have captured our attention. *

    You can bet your sweet muffins that we talked after that smooth introduction, and boy, did we talk. Non stop talking. And here is what I found out:

• I love country music, he loves heavy metal music
• I love spicy foods, he hates anything spicy
• I love being outdoors, he loves being inside playing video games
• I love being spontaneous, he loves planning
• I love any reason to celebrate, he is (still) learning to celebrate things
• I love color, he is learning to love color.

    I can continue on like that for a while... but I will stop it there. As you can see, we are polar opposites. But no matter what, we couldn't stop talking to each other. A simple text message or facebook message filled me with joy and happiness. 

    That summer, he was sent on a training cruise with the Navy. During that time, we emailed every chance we had. We grew closer and closer. At one point, he told me that he wished that I could be there to pick him up from the airport when he came home. I told him that I wouldn't be able to, but that we would have to make plans to meet up.

    A mutual friend of ours realized that we were talking, and managed to get me out to Tucson Airport on the day that he was to come home. I was so nervous, and managed to convince him that I was at home. He was irritated and short with me when, on top of me not being there, his flight was delayed by 3 hours.

    Finally, at 2 am, in a virtually empty airport, (except for like, a janitor and a security guard), I saw him walk down the stairs. Wearing a pair of too big jeans, baggy gray t-shirt, and a pair of beat up sneakers. His blue eyes looked for our friend. But she was hiding behind a pillar filming this because she was convinced that he would see me and freak out.

    But he didn't. He looked right past me and searched for our friend. He actually found her before he saw me. But when he finally looked at me, and his brain made the connection. He dropped his luggage, hands went over his mouth, and after an "Oh my God" moment, he hugged me.

    It was at that moment in time, when his arms wrapped around me, and my head rested against his chest. That moment when my good ear was pressed against his chest, hearing his heart beat, and his deep voice say, "You're here...". I knew that I loved him. I wouldn't have the word formed just yet, but we fell in love.

    2 1/2 years later, he proposed, and 9 months later, we were married on May 21, 2013. 

The above photo was on our wedding day, the photo below was on our one year anniversary.

And that is the story on how I fell in love. :)

-Haley